When Selling Feels good: The Power of Genuine Connection
When I first started offering my work, I often felt like I was entering a transactional space—a place where the only measure of success was whether someone signed up or paid. It could feel uncomfortable, and sometimes even disheartening. No wonder I hated selling! Over time, I realized that what I was offering didn’t have to be measured solely in immediate outcomes.
What if, instead of focusing on transactions, I saw every conversation and every interaction as an opportunity to connect?
Some volunteer work I did purely to give back to institutions I cared about unexpectedly led me to meet clients with whom I’ve since done a variety of projects. These were relationships that began purely through connection, not sales. Similarly, a conversation about a personal crowdfunding campaign I ran eventually inspired a bursary program that has helped far more people than I ever imagined. These experiences reminded me that connection often precedes opportunity, and that the true value of engagement may not be immediately visible.
When I shifted my perspective this way, the process of offering my gifts began to feel lighter and more authentic. Talking about what I do became less about convincing and more about nurturing relationships—reconnecting with old acquaintances, sharing ideas with people I care about, and exploring possibilities with new contacts.
Sometimes, the reward isn’t in a sale at all—it’s the joy of reconnecting with someone, of sharing a thought, or simply being present. Other times, the impact of a conversation or connection only reveals itself much later, in ways we couldn’t have anticipated at the time. And sometimes, a conversation sparks new ideas or inspiration, either for ourselves or for others, regardless of whether anything is sold in the end.
Ironically, this approach is often more persuasive than traditional selling. When your intention is genuine—focused on understanding, listening, and sharing rather than pressuring—people are more open, curious, and receptive. Authenticity creates its own influence.
Approaching selling this way also changes how we think about mistakes or misunderstandings. When connection is the focus, missteps are just part of the learning process. They don’t erase the value of what we bring—they become opportunities to reflect, clarify, and deepen our understanding of ourselves and others.
By seeing selling as an act of service, it becomes easier to step into conversations with curiosity and openness:
How can I share what I do in ways that feel genuine?
Who might benefit from this work, and how can I reach them thoughtfully?
How can I engage without pressure, seeing each interaction as an exchange of ideas rather than a transaction?
When we approach our work this way, selling stops feeling like a burden. It becomes an extension of the care, thoughtfulness, and effort we’ve already invested. It’s not about giving something up—it’s about allowing what’s valuable to meet the world in ways that are meaningful, inspiring, and aligned with our values.
If these reflections spark something for you, I’d love to stay connected and keep exploring together.
